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Showing posts with label Emotional. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Emotional. Show all posts

Thursday, October 4, 2012

7 Things Your Muslim Wife Wont Tell You

In the name of Allah, the Most-Merciful, the All-Compassionate
 
"May the Peace and Blessings of Allah be Upon You"
 
Praise be to Allaah, we seek His help and His forgiveness. We seek refuge with Allaah from the evil of our own souls and from our bad deeds. Whomsoever Allaah guides will never be led astray, and whomsoever Allaah leaves astray, no one can guide. I bear witness that there is no god but Allaah, and I bear witness that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.
 
  
Bismillah Walhamdulillah Was Salaatu Was Salaam 'ala Rasulillah
As-Salaam Alaikum Wa-Rahmatullahi Wa-Barakatuhu

Some Verdicts Pertaining to Supplications
Usamah bin Zaid (May Allah be pleased with them) reported: The Messenger of Allah (PBUH) said, "He who is favoured by another and says to his benefactor: `Jazak-Allah khairan (may Allah reward you well) indeed praised (the benefactor) satisfactorily."[At-Tirmidhi].


Commentary:
If one is unable to return someone's kindness with kindness, he should say, "Jazak-Allahu khairan (may Allah reward you well)." This means: "I am unable to reciprocate your kindness. May Allah grant you the best reward for it." Obviously there is no match for the reward that one gets from Allah. For this reason the Prophet (PBUH) said that it was the best of the praise for a benefactor.

252/1496 - Riyad Us-Saliheen (Gardens of the Righteous)
 


1. Above All, She Wants Your Love

When a wife shows her husband less respect, he in turn shows her less love.
And when a husband shows his wife less love, she in turn shows him less respect.
And the vicious cycle repeats itself.
Stop this prophecy before it becomes self-fulfilling. Show love to your wife. Thats what she wants. Love her despite her flaws and quirks.
And Inshallah, she’ll respect you despite your flaws and quirks.

2. She is Bored

Its the same thing every day. Week in and week out. Not only is she bored but she is also tired. She has to care for the kids and run the household and then pamper you.

Just thinking about doing that every day makes me want to crawl under my covers and hide. I can imagine how the average Muslim housewife must feel.

And lets not forget about working woman. Many Muslim women have to work a full time job as well as hold a house down.

So brothers, I implore you, make your wife feel special.
Give her a break.
Take her out sometimes. Surprise her with a surprise meal. Bring her favorite desert home.
Just do something every now and then to break the monotony.

3. She Wants to Be Complimented

Appreciation. Everybody wants it. No one wants to feel as if the hard work they do goes unnoticed or even worse, it taken for granted.

Your wife does not have to clean your dirty clothes. And she does not have to cook your meals. But she does. And she does that on top of all the other things in her life:
Working or going to school.
Caring for the kids.
Striving to be a better Muslimah.

Show your wife that you appreciate and are thankful for the things she does to maintain you and your family.
A simple “thank you” is a good start.

4. She is Insanely Jealous

There is a reason most women dont care for polygamy.
Be very careful how you talk about other women around your wife.

Dont ever compare your wife to another woman.
Dont compare her to some female movie star.
Dont compare her to your mother.
Never, ever compare her to your ex-wife (or other wife!)

She wants to know and believe that she is the center of your universe. So make her feel that way.

Even the Prophets (pbuh) wives got jealous. Aisha (RA) even got jealous of Khadijah (RA) even though she had already died several years before.

5. She Wants You to Help Her Become A Better Muslimah

Your wife desires and wants you to be her leader. And what better way to lead her than to be show her how to be a better Muslimah?
But you cant show her how to become better if you’re not that great either.
Therefore, you have to upgrade your Iman.
You have to improve yourself and then pass it on to her in a gentle, respectful way.

6. She Does not Like to Nag, But Sometimes You Make It Hard

Its a common myth that women like to nag their husbands. Thats not entirely true.
Yes, there are some people (men and women) whom you can never please. No matter what you do, they will always find fault in something.

Let us be reminded of the following hadith:
Narrated Ibn Abbas: The Prophet said: “I was shown the Hell-fire and that the majority of its dwellers were women who were ungrateful.” It was asked, “Do they disbelieve in Allah?” (or are they ungrateful to Allah?) He replied, “They are ungrateful to their husbands and are ungrateful for the favors and the good (charitable deeds) done to them. If you have always been good (benevolent) to one of them and then she sees something in you (not of her liking), she will say, ‘I have never received any good from you.”
Sahih Bukhari

So, yes sisters should be careful about denigrating the things your husband does for you.
But very often, you Brother, make it hard for her to hold your tongue.
Perhaps you are always finding fault with her and she looks for things in your character to get even.
Perhaps you are not working (or not working hard enough) and she has to work to take up some slack.
Perhaps you are just not that great of a guy.
Once again, upgrade yourself and give her less reasons to complain and nag.

7. More Than Anything, She Wants a Stable,
Happy Relationship With You

Women dont get married just because they think its gonna be fun.
They get married because they want a happy family life and they believe you are gonna give it to them.
Outside of her religious duties, thats the most important thing in a Muslim womans life. Raising a happy, stable, Muslim family.

The funny thing is, its very easy for you to give that to her.
Stop acting like a jerk. Be a good husband to her. Be kind. Show her you love her.

Dont threaten her with divorce or taking a second wife. But using them as threats is inappropriate and detrimental to your marriage.

Trust in Allah, watch out for the tricks of Shaytan, and be patient with her. Theres nothing Shaytan would love more than to destroy your marriage.
See? That isnt all that hard, now is it ?
  Permission is granted to circulate among private individuals and groups, to post on Internet sites and to publish in full text and subject title in not-for-profit publications.
 
 

Bid'ah (Innovation In Islam)


In the name of Allah, the Most-Merciful, the All-Compassionate
 
"May the Peace and Blessings of Allah be Upon You"
Praise be to Allaah, we seek His help and His forgiveness. We seek refuge with Allaah from the evil of our own souls and from our bad deeds. Whomsoever Allaah guides will never be led astray, and whomsoever Allaah leaves astray, no one can guide. I bear witness that there is no god but Allaah, and I bear witness that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.
  


Bismillah Walhamdulillah Was Salaatu Was Salaam 'ala Rasulillah
As-Salaam Alaikum Wa-Rahmatullahi Wa-Barakatuhu


Narrated Abu Huraira (Radi Allahu anhu):

The Prophet (SallAllahu alaihi wasallam) said, "A time will come upon the people when one will not care how one gains one's money, legally or illegally."

Sahih Al-Bukhari 3:275


Bidah

1. Reasons behind the Existence of Bidah. 
2. Bidah Corrupting the Sunnah.
3. Shunning the Bidah - Adherence to the Sunnah.
4. Arguments of the Misguided.
The word Bidah in Arabic is taken from Al-Bada', that is to create something without precedence. Allah says in the Quran, which translated means: Badei' (the Originator) of the heavens and the earth. [Surah Al-Baqarah Verse 117] 

This means that Allah created the heavens and the earth without precedence. He also said: Say (O Muhammad (saws): I am not Bidan (a new thing) among the Messengers. [Surah Ahqaf Verse 9] 

This means: 'I am not the first of Allah's Prophets to His slaves, many (Prophets) preceded me. When it is said that a person has performed a Bidah, this means that he has innovated a new thing without precedence.

Bidahs in the matters of life, like the new scientific inventions are permissible because originally, what is a matter of life or habit is permissible. The prohibited Bidah is to innovate in the religion. This is because the religion is 'Tawqifiyah' which means that religion can only be revealed by Allah and He has completely revealed His religion. Consequently, there is no room for any innovation. As will be manifest and clear from the following text. 


Allah Alone has the right to tell us how to worship Him.

Allah says Surah Al-Araf Verse 3: Follow what has been sent down to you from your Lord (the Qur'aan and the Sunnah of Prophet Muhaamd (sallallhu alahi wa-sallam) and follow not any Auliya (protectors, or helper etc. who order you to associate partners in worship with Allah), besides Him. 

From the Tafseer (explanation) of this verse, we learn that this verse is a definite statement, explaining the right of Allah Alone; to reveal and command His slaves, the manners of worshipping Him. And how could it be otherwise, when the true meaning of 'Ibaadah' is to worship Allah in the way, which pleases Him, not following one's own desires. As is known from the following verse:"And who is more astray then one who follows his own lust (desires) without the guidance from Allah (revelation)" [Surah Al-Qasas Verse 50] 

In regards to this Prophet Muhammad (saws) said: "I warn you of the newly invented matters (in the religion), and every newly invented matter is an innovation, and every innovation is misguidance, and every misguidance is in the Hellfire" [An-Nasa'ee] 

And He (saws) used to declare at the beginning of his lectures, ".and the best speech is the Speech of Allah, and the best guidance is the guidance of Muhammad (saws), and the worst of all affairs are the newly invented matters (in the religion)" [Sahih Muslim] 

And He (saws) also commanded us, to reject everything, which has no basis in the religion saying:Whosoever does an action, which we have not commanded then it must be rejected." [Sahih Muslim] 

"Whosoever introduces into this religion of ours that which is not a part of it then it must be rejected [Musnad Ahmad] 

In this Hadeeth is a clear evidence that every action which is not legislated in the Shariah must be rejected [Jaami al-Ulum of ibn Rajab 1/120] 

Consequently, every Bidah, that is introduced in the religion has to be rejected as for the reason that only Allah and His Messenger (saws) have the right to legislate in the Shariah. 


The Deen is complete 

Allah says in the Quran Surah Maidah Verse 4: "This day have I perfected your religion for you, completed My favour upon you, and have chosen for you Islam as your religion" 

This verse embodies a clear statement that the religion has been completed and so has no need of addition and deletion, and our noble Messenger (saws) said: "There is nothing that Allah ordered you with except that I have ordered you with it, and there is nothing that Allah forbade you from except that I have forbidden you from it" [al-Bayhaqee and others] 

And He (saws) said, "There is nothing that will take you closer to Paradise but that I have enjoined it upon you, and there is nothing that will take you closer to Hell but that I have warned you from it [Musnad ash-Shafi'e and others] 

So, Prophet Muhammad (saws) fulfilled the trust placed upon him by Allah completely, explaining the religion to the people in it's inward and outward form, making clear the lawful from the prohibited, the encouraged from the discouraged, even to the extent that he (saws) taught us the manners of going to the toilet, the manners of having sex with our partners etc. 

Allah also says in His Book Surah Al-Maidah Verse 89: "and We have sent down to you Book (the Quran) as an exposition (explanation) of everything, a guidance, a mercy and a glad tiding for those who have submitted themselves (to Allah). 

Hence, Quran contains the explanation of the entire religious principles, tawheed in all it's various categories, even to the extent that it teaches us the manners of sitting in circles, visiting other people's houses, the correct clothing etc.  

In the light of what has preceded we can now give the formal Shariah definition of bidah... "A newly invented way (in beliefs and actions) in the religion, in imitation of the Shariah, by which nearness to Allah is sought, not being supported by any authentic proof, neither in it's foundations nor in the manner in which it is performed." [al-I'tisaam 1/231 of ash-Shaatibee] 
 
Reasons behind the Existence of Bidah 

(a) IGNORANCE: Whenever people separate from the True Message, knowledge will decrease and ignorance will flourish. The Prophet of Allah (saws) informed us about this adversity when He said: Whoever lives (long) will witness many differences. [Abu Dawood] 

And He (saws) also said: Allah does not erase knowledge (from earth) by erasing knowledge from slaves (hearts). Rather, He erases knowledge through the death of scholars. When He leaves (earth) without scholars, people will take the ignorant as leaders (and scholars). They (the ignorant) will be asked and then give fatawah without knowledge. Then, they will be lead, and will lead astray. [Ahmad] 

People of knowledge are those who fight against Bid'ahs. When knowledge and scholars disappear from earth, then Bidah will see the light. Bidah will then appear and spread. 

(b) FOLLOWING ONE'S OWN DESIRES: Whoever shuns the Qur'aan and the Sunnah, and follows his own desires, then pertaining him Allah says Surah Al-Qasas Verse 50:But if they answer you not (O Muhammad (saws) (i.e. do not believe in your teachings of Islamic Monotheism, nor follow you), then know that they only follow their own lusts. And who is more astray then one who follows his own lust (desires) without the guidance from Allah (revelation)" 

Surah A-Jathiyah Verse 23: Have you seen him who takes his own desires as his god, and Allah knowing (him as such) left him astray, sealed his hearing and his heart, and put a cover on his sight. Who then will guide him after Allah. 

So, following one's own desires leads one to straying away from the Straight Path and indulging in evil innovation

(c) BLIND FOLLOWING: When it is said to them: 'Follow peoples opinion blindly prevents one from following the Straight path. Allah said what translated means: Follow what Allah has sent down. They say: Nay! We shall follow what we found our fathers following. Even though their fathers did not understand anything, nor were they guided. [Surah al-Baqarah Verse 170]

This is the case today with those who blindly follow a Madhab. If they are called to following the Quran and the Sunnah, leaving their traditions, what opposes them, they claim to follow their own Madhab, scholars, fathers or grandfathers, which leads them to indulge in many evil affairs known as rituals and traditions, originated from the worst of affairs; Bidahs resulting to the final abode in Hellfire.

(d) IMITATING THE KUFFAR
Imitating the Kuffar is what befalls one most in Bidahs, because actions of the Kuffar are built only upon corruption and misguidance.

Abu Waqid Al-Laithi said: We were still new Muslims when we went to the battle of Hunain with the Prophet (saws). We found that the Mushrikeen had a tree, called That Anwar, which they revered and on which they hanged their weapons on. When we passed by a similar Sidrah we said: O Messenger of Allah (sallallhu alahi wa-sallam), make for us 'That Anwar' as they have.. Prophet (saws) said: Allahu Akbar! It is the Sunnan (traditions of the Mushrikeen). You said by He Who has my soul in His Hand, what the children of Israel said to Moses: Make for us gods as they have gods. He said: 'Verily! You are a people who know not. [7:138] and He (saws) said: You will follow the traditions of those before you (Jews and Christians) [at-Tirmidhee] 

In this hadeeth, we find that imitating the Kuffar (non-believers) is what drove Jews (before them), and some of the companions (ra), to ask for this ugly matter. They wanted gods to worship and revere other than Allah. This is the case with the majority of Muslims today, imitating the disbelievers, which is an opening to ruthless Bidahs in Islam.

Bidah is more Beloved to Shaytaan than Sinning Sufyaan ath-Thawree (rahimahullah) said: "Innovations are more beloved to Shaytaan than sin. Since a sin may be repented from but an innovation is not repented [Sharh Usul I'tiqaad of al-Laalikaa'ee (d.414) no.238]

This is because the innovator believes that he is doing something good and therefore sees no need to repent.

He also said, "so cling to the original state of affairs" [al-Hilya 6/376] meaning stick to the way of Muhammad (saws) and Companions

Imaam Abu Haneefah (rahimahullah) said, "Stick to the narrations and the way of the salaf, and beware of the newly invented matters for all of it is innovation" [Sawnul Muntaq of as-Suyutee pg.32] 

Imaam Maalik (rahimahullah) said, "He, who innovates an innovation in Islam regarding it as something good, has claimed that Muhammad (saws) has betrayed his trust to deliver the message as Allah says Surah Al-Maidah Verse 4: "This day have I perfected your religion for you, completed My favour upon you, and have chosen for you Islam as your religion [al-I'tisaam]

Imaam Ahmad (rahimahullah) said, "The fundamental principles of the sunnah with us are avoiding innovations and every innovation is misguidance" [Usul as-Sunnah of Imaam Ahmad pg.1] 
Bidah Corrupting the Sunnah

We are taught in the revelation that the Sunnah shall become corrupted and this corruption would become the norm (custom), so much so that the people who follow the Sunnah would become as strangers, and those who call to purifying the sunnah would be slandered and reviled (hated).

The Prophet (saws) said: "Islam began as something strange, and it shall return as something strange as it began. So who give glad tidings to the strangers." It was asked, "who are the strangers?" He replied, "Those that purify and correct what the people have corrupted of my sunnah" [Tabaraanee in al-Kabeer

And what is this corruption, it is none other than innovation, introducing into the pure religion of Allah, new ways of worshipping Him that He has not taught, blemishing His religion with one's own whims and desires, something that Allah Himself condemns:
Surah Ash-Shura Verse 21: "Or do they have partners with Allah, who have instituted for them a religion which Allah has not allowed.

The Companion Abdullaah ibn Mas'ud (ra) laments: How will it be when the trials overcome you, in which the young grow old and the old grow senile. And the people take the Bidah as the sunnah, and when it changes they say: the sunnah has changed. It was said: When will this be? O Abu Abdur Rahmaan! He replied: When your speakers are many and your scholars are few, and the wealthy ones are plenty and the trustworthy ones are few." [ad-Daarimee] 

How true this statement is today, that the innovations have become so widespread in the religion that the people have taken them to be the Sunnah. And when the true scholar speaks out against these innovations, he is labelled as a 'wahhabi' by the people because to them it seems that he is changing the sunnah. To Allah, we complain of the ignorance of our times!

So, once this topic becomes clear, a truth that none can deny; that all these innovations in the religions are a clear denial of the above mentioned verses and ahadith, for none were done by the Companions (ra). And in what has preceded is ample evidence for any fair-minded Muslim that all Bidah is blameworthy, and in fact a major sin. But unfortunately, the Muslims are in such a state today that the Words of Allah and His Messenger (saws) are no longer enough to convince them and certain groups of people have come up with belief that has very frail grounds in the Sunnah. For example, the belief of 'Bidah hasanah', i.e. a good Bidah, meaning that a scholar can introduce a new action of worship in Islam, which can be considered to be good as long it does not contradict any of the principles of Islam. This belief is completely false and has no basis in the Quran neither in the Sunnah of our Prophet Muhammad (saws). This issue will be discuss later in details inshallah,
Shunning the Bidah - Adherence to the Sunnah 

The cure for shunning these newly invented matters has been specified in the texts of Quran and the Sunnah: Allah has revealed the religion of Islam unto Prophet Muhammad (saws), and made adherence to his way, the cure to misguidance:

Surah Anam Verse 153: Say 'And Verily, this is My Straight Path, so follow it, and follow not (other) paths, for they will separate you away from this Path.'

Allah also says in the Quran Surah Ahzab Verse 21: Indeed in the Messenger of Allah, you have an excellent example to follow for him, who hopes in (the meeting with) Allah and the Last Day and remembers Allah much.

Prophet (saws) said: "I have left behind me two things, if you cling to them you will never go astray. They are the Book of Allah and my Sunnah" [al-Haakim] 

And " and you will live to see great difference, so cling to my sunnah and the sunnah of the rightly guided caliphs after me, even if it be with your teeth" [Bukhari] 

Abdullaah ibn Mas'ud (ra) said: Follow the sunnah of Muhammad (saws) and do not innovate, for what you have been commanded is enough for you." [Ad-Daarimee] 

Hudhayfah bin al-Yaman (ra) said, "every act of worship that the Companions did not do, do not do it" [Abu Dawood] 

The Taabi'ee, the Imaam, az-Zuhree commented, "Clinging to the sunnah is to be saved, as Imaam Maalik (rahimahillah) said, 'like the Ark of Noah', he who embarked upon it was saved, and he who did not was destroyed." [Ad-Daarimee] 

Abu Aaliyah said, "Learn Islam, then when you have learned Islam, do not turn away from it to the right or to the left. But be upon the Straight Path and be upon the Sunnah of your Prophet (saws) and that which his companions were upon. 

And beware of these innovations because they cause enmity and hatred amongst you, but stick to the original state of affairs that was there before they divided." [al-Hilya of Abu Nu'aym 2/218] 

In these narrations is clear evidence that the way of salvation and safety is to closely follow the Sunnah of our Prophet (saws), and not to deviate from his path, denying the guidance of others, not accepting a corrupted form of the Sunnah.

Allah says Surah An-Nisa Verse 115: "And whosoever does not contends with the Messenger after guidance has been made clear to him, and follows a way other than the way of the believers, We shall leave in the path he has chosen, and land him in Hell, what an evil destination!
Arguments of the Misguided

Know, O noble reader! The saying that some Bidahs are good and that not every Bidah is a sin, rather some Bidahs are good is a clear misguidance. Every example that these misguided bring from the actions of the Sahaba(ra) to prove their belief of a 'good innovation', is invalid and it just shows their weak understanding of the Sunnah of Muhammad (saws), for all of these examples have a clear basis in the Sharee'ah, or occurred due to necessity, or from ijtihaad. Insha'Allah, we will mention a few of their arguments: 

Initially, know that their saying is in opposition to the Hadeeth: For every Bid'ah is a sin [Abu Dawood] 

The Prophet of Allah (saws) clearly stated that all Bidahs are sins. 

Ibn Rajab says regarding this issue: The Prophet's (saws) saying: 'every Bidah is a sin' is a unique way of speech that nothing (no Bidah) can escape. This is a major rule in this religion. It is similar to Prophet's (saws) saying: Whoever innovates, in this religion of ours, whatever is not of it, is rejected. 

Whoever innovates a matter that has no basis in Islam, and introduced it to the religion, has sinned. The religion disowns whoever does that. This rule applies to all matters of belief, action, and saying, both in public or in secrecy.

1. When Umar (ra) was caliph, he collected the Muslims to pray in congregation for taraaweeh prayers and said, "what a good bid'ah this is" [Sahih Bukhari] 

Evidence is derived from this for 'bidah hasanah' (i.e. Good Bidah), but of course they have misunderstood the true intent of Umar (ra), which can be clearly understood if one were to quote the context of this narration. 

When the Prophet (saws) first prayed taraweeh, the Muslims used to pray taraweeh individually or in small groups, and then for three nights they prayed in one congregation behind the Prophet (saws), and after this he (saws) stopped them from doing so by saying: 
"I feared that it would become obligatory upon you." So after this again, the Muslims would pray individually or in small groups, and they remained like this throughout the rule of Abu Bakr (ra) and the beginning of the rule of Umar (ra). Then Umar (ra) came to the Mosque and saw the Muslims praying in small groups and so gathered them as one jama'ah to pray behind Ubayy bin Ka'b (ra) and Tameem ad-Daaree (ra) and stated the above phrase. [Reported in Bukhari, the Muwatta and others] 

Firstly: How can the action of Umar (ra) be considered to be new when the Prophet (saws) did it in his lifetime? Not only this but the Muslims were also in the habit of praying in small groups as well. Hence, the praying of taraweeh in jamaa'ah was well established in the sunnah and the practice of the Sahabah (ra). 

Secondly: The Prophet (saws) gave the reason why he stopped the congregational prayer, for the revelation was still descending, and he feared that praying in obligation might become obligatory upon his nation, and that this might lead to be hard on them. 

After the death of Muhammad (saws), the revelation ceased, and this fear was no longer present. Hence, Umar (ra) re-established the congregation during his rule because he knew his action could not be made obligatory upon the ummah. 

Thirdly: All the companions agreed to this action of Umar (ra), there was a consensus (ijmaa) on this. And the scholars of 'usul' have stated that a consensus cannot occur except when there is a clear text for it in the Shariah. 

Fourth: So how do we understand this statement of Umar (ra), "what a good bidah this is" when the action that Umar (ra) called a bidah was done by the Prophet saws? Bidah here can only be understood in it's linguistic sense and not in it's Shariah sense i.e. when Umar (ra) said this, he did not mean it in the legal sense that we may understand it today. For how many are the words that mean one thing in the language, but another thing in the Shariah! The linguistic sense is: something new, because praying in one congregation was not present in the rule of Abu Bakr (ra) and the earlier period of his own rule. 

Hence, Abu Yusuf (rahimahullah) said, "I asked Abu Haneefah (rahimahullah) about the taraweeh and what Umar (ra) did and he replied, 'the taraweeh is a stressed sunnah, and Umar (ra) did not do that from his own opinion, and neither was there in his action any innovation, and he did not enjoin it except that there was a foundation for it with him and authorization from the Prophet (saws)" ['Sharh Mukhtaar' as quoted from in 'al-Ibdaa' (pg. 80) of Shaykh Alee Mahfooz] 

2.The hadithWhosoever starts in Islam a good practice (sunnah), he gets the reward of it and the reward of all those, who act on it. And whosoever starts in Islam an evil practice (sunnah), he gets the evil of it and the evil of all those, who act on it." [Saheeh Muslim] 

The evidence they derive from this hadeeth is that people can invent new practices in Islam, either good or bad. But were they to take this hadith in it's full context then it would not be possible to infer such a thing. 

Imam Muslim(rahimahullah) reported this story from Jareer ibn 'Abdullaah (ra) who also narrated: "Some people came to Prophet (saws) wearing woollen garments. He (saws) saw that they were in bad shape and in desperate need, so he (saws) urged the people to give them charity. People were very slow to respond, and it could be seen on his face (that he was upset). Then a man of the Ansaar brought a package of silver, then another came, then after him another and another, and his face was filled with joy. He (saws) said: 'Whoever starts a good thing in Islam, and others do likewise after him, there will be written for him a reward like that of those who followed him, without detracting it in the least from their reward. Whoever starts a bad thing in Islam, and others do likewise after him, there will be written for him a burden of sin like that of those who followed him, without detracting it in the least from their burden. [Sahih Muslim, no. 1017] 

Firstly: The word sunnah used in the hadith must be understood in it's linguistic sense (i.e. practice) not it's shariah sense (i.e. the life example of Muhammad (saws) because otherwise it would imply that there is something bad in the sunnah. 

Secondly: The Sahaba (ra) who gave charity, did not do anything new, for giving charity had been legislated from the very early days of Islam as the Makkan surahs prove, rather he was simply implementing a previously legislated matter. So, the statement of the Prophet (saws), 'a good sunnah' was said at a time when the people were reluctant to give charity, so one man gave it and then others followed him - i.e. he renewed a sunnah that was being neglected - this is the meaning of 'good practice' - renewing an existing sunnah. 

Hence, we do not stick just to the specific occurrence in the hadith, but we generalize it's intent as it's wording is general and as is established in the 'usul'. The intent of this hadeeth is renewing the Sunnah when it has been neglected. This is why the early scholars of Islam included this hadeeth under the chapter "The reward of the one who renews the sunnah" [as done by the 4th century Imaam al-Laalikaa'ee in his encyclopedic work detailing the belief of Ahlus Sunnah, 'Sharh Usul I'tiqaad Ahlus Sunnah wal Jamaa'ah'] 

Thirdly: The meaning of 'bad sunnah' is to be understood in the similar vein, i.e. the one who renews an evil act, will get it's evil. Prophet (saws) gave the example of the two sons of Adam (alaihi as-salaam), one killing the other, one who killed got the sin of his action as well the sin of all those who follow hi in killing; without their sins decreasing, an killing had been forbidden from the time of the first Prophet (alahi as-salaam) to the last. 

Fourthly: The hadeeth uses the terms 'good' and 'bad', and from what has preceded, it is clear that Islam has already defined in it's totality all that it is good and bad, and if we were to say otherwise, we would then be accusing the religion of incompleteness and deficiency.
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 We All LOVE Islam
But We Create Our Own Rules On How To Follow Islam.
Do We Really LIVE Islam ???

Sunday, September 30, 2012

7 Things Your Muslim Husband Wont Tell You



In the name of Allah, the Most-Merciful, the All-Compassionate
 
"May the Peace and Blessings of Allah be Upon You"
Praise be to Allaah, we seek His help and His forgiveness. We seek refuge with Allaah from the evil of our own souls and from our bad deeds. Whomsoever Allaah guides will never be led astray, and whomsoever Allaah leaves astray, no one can guide. I bear witness that there is no god but Allaah, and I bear witness that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.
  
Bismillah Walhamdulillah Was Salaatu Was Salaam 'ala Rasulillah
As-Salaam Alaikum Wa-Rahmatullahi Wa-Barakatuhu

Prohibition of Listening to Backbiting
Abud-Darda (May Allah be pleased with him) said: The Prophet (PBUH) said, "He who defends the honour of his (Muslim) brother, Allah will secure his face against the Fire on the Day of Resurrection."[At-Tirmidhi].
Commentary:

If someone says something disgraceful against a Muslim, one must defend his Muslim brother (or sister, for that matter) and say that what has been stated about him or her is wrong and that he (or she) is free from the accusation made against him (or her).
255/1528 - Riyad Us-Saliheen (Gardens of the Righteous)

7 Things Your Muslim Husband Wont Tell You

1. Above All, He Desires Your Respect

In Islam, men are taught from a young age that they are supposed to be the bread-winners and caretakers of their families.

You can imagine how frustrating it would be for a man, who tries his best to care for his family, to be married to a woman who may not respect him. She may declare that she loves him, but without her respect, he will quickly fall out of love with her.
This idea is put forward in the Quran where Allah says:
Men are in charge of women by what Allah has given one over the other and what they spend from their wealth. So righteous women are devoutly obedient, guarding in [the husband] absence what Allah would have them guard.
Chapter 4, Verse 34
Sisters , if you fear there is a problem in your marriage ,I would suggest you start here.

2. He Desires Your Loyalty

This goes hand in hand with respect.There is nothing that will ruin a marriage quicker than the idea that your spouse is not loyal. The idea, that he or she is not going to stick by you.
I am not talking about infidelity. This is what usually comes to mind when people talk about loyalty in a marriage.
What I am talking about is knowing that the person whom you have chosen to spend the rest of your life with is going to be there for you when you really need them.
Most men will not admit it, but they do need women.
And we do need your support.
And it is very troubling to be married to a woman who may not be around when the going gets tough.

If you are constantly threatening divorce or separation or Khula (Islamic divorce initiated by the wife), you can expect your marriage to fizzle out very quickly.

Your husband needs to know that you are going to be by his side if:
  • He loses his job and the money gets tight.
  • He tries to do something (like start a business or go back to school) but fails at it.
  • His reputation is tarnished or his honor is attacked.
If you’re loyal to your husband, than rest assured he will be loyal to you.

3. He Wants To Have Love More Often

Lets get this right out into the open.
Some women might think men are narrow-minded brutes for this, but its the truth.
Men desire love. Men really desire love.
So when you give him the following excuses:
  • “I got a headache.”
  • “I am not feeling good.”
  • “Cant it wait till the weekend? I am really not in the mood.”
Know that your husband is going to go to sleep a little upset with you, even if he does not show it.

And do this often enough, he is going to start resenting you. And that resentment will build up and may lead to him being unnecessarily mean to you or losing some love.
When a man calls his wife to his bed, and she does not respond and he (the husband) spends the night angry with her, the angels curse her until morning.
Bukhari and Muslim.
Something to think about.

4. He Thinks About Other Women

Okay, first of all, calm down. Let me explain this.
Most men think about other women.
It does not mean he is going to cheat on you.
It does not mean he is thinking about taking a second wife.
It does not mean he is fantasizing about another woman.
It just means that all (straight) men do, at some point in their lives, consider having another woman (i.e. wife).

The best way to combat these thoughts are to apply the advice given in the first three secrets:
  • Respect him.
  • Be loyal to him.
  • Give him physical love when he wants it.

5. He Wants To Make You Happy

Why do you think men work so hard to make money?
Why do you think men are willing to leave their jobs and risk starting a business?
Why do you think men like buying women gifts?
Because deep down, we really just want to make you happy.
Sometimes we screw it up and forget our anniversary.
But we really would prefer to remember because we know it would make you happy.
So when your husband buys you a gift, accept it, rejoice over it, thank him profusely, and use it as often as possible.
If he buys you some jewelry, wear it.
If he buys you a new smartphone, use it.
And dont be so quick to nag him about the things he doesnt do right. Because then he will start feeling that you do not respect (theres that word again) the things he does do for you.

6. If You Nudge Him, He Can Be A Better Muslim

Nobodys perfect.
Perhaps your husband isnt a Muslim scholar. Perhaps hes not the best Muslim in the world.
You can nudge him to make him better. But you cant force him.
Do little things to get him to improve his Islam.
  • Offer to wake him up for Salaatul Fajr.
  • Encourage him to make Salah at the Masjid.
  • Tell him how much nicer he would look if he grew his beard.
This takes deliberate words, a soft touch, and careful action. No one likes to be preached to.
But if you do this right, you’ll be getting a double reward:

The reward that comes with living with a righteous husband. And the reward in the next life for encouraging your husband to the truth.
Except for those who have believed and done righteous deeds and advised each other to truth and advised each other to patience.
Chapter 103, Verse 3

7. He Loves You, Even If He Doesnt Always Show It

I know, this one may be kinda hard to swallow. But its true (usually).
Men are just not that good at showing emotion (unless we are talking sports or politics).
We dont tell our wives “I love you” often enough.
We are not perfect. And constantly comparing us to Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) aint helping.
Of course, we are supposed to emulate him (pbuh) as much as we can. And for most of us, we are doing the best we can.

But we just cant treat you the same way he (pbuh) treated his wives. Similarly, it is unfair for men to expect their wives to behave like Aisha (RA) and his other wives (RA) did.
Just because your husband doesnt treat you in the way (you think) the Prophet (pbuh) treated his wives, doesnt mean your husband doesn’t love you.
It just means he is human.
It is very important that you understand this.
  • If he is doing his best to take care of you.
  • If he does not abuse you or sleep around.
  • If he sincerely tries to solve your problems and helps you in the best way he can.
Then chances are he loves you. A lot.


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Sunday, September 23, 2012

Seeking Refuge with Allah - Tafsir Ibn Kathir




In the name of Allah, the Most-Merciful, the All-Compassionate
 
"May the Peace and Blessings of Allah be Upon You"
Praise be to Allaah, we seek His help and His forgiveness. We seek refuge with Allaah from the evil of our own souls and from our bad deeds. Whomsoever Allaah guides will never be led astray, and whomsoever Allaah leaves astray, no one can guide. I bear witness that there is no god but Allaah, and I bear witness that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.
  
Bismillah Walhamdulillah Was Salaatu Was Salaam 'ala Rasulillah
As-Salaam Alaikum Wa-Rahmatullahi Wa-Barakatuhu


Seeking Refuge with Allah - Tafsir Ibn Kathir - Surah Fatihah

"Authu Billahi min-ash Shaytani Rajim"
(I seek refuge with Allah from the cursed Satan)

"I seek refuge with Allah from the cursed Satan so that he is prevented from affecting my religious or worldly affairs, or hindering me from adhering to what I was commanded, or luring me into what I was prohibited from. 

Indeed, only Allah is able to prevent the evil of Satan from touching the son of Adam. This is why Allah allowed us to be lenient and kind with the human devil, so that his soft nature might cause him to refrain from the evil he is indulging in. 

However, Allah required us to seek refuge with Him from the evil of Satan, because he (satan) neither accepts bribes nor does kindness affect him, for he is pure evil. Thus, only He Who created Satan is able to stop his evil. 


This meaning is reiterated in only three Ayat in the Quran. Allah said in Surat Al-Araf:

"Show forgiveness, enjoin what is good, and turn away from the foolish (i.e. dont punish them)." [Noble Quran 7:199]

This is about dealing with human beings. He then said in the same Surah:

"And if an evil whisper comes to you from Shaytan, then seek refuge with Allah. Verily, He is Hearing, Knowing" [Noble Quran 7:200]


Allah also said in Surat Al-Muminun:
"Repel evil with that which is better. We are Best-Acquainted with the things they utter. And say: "My Lord! I seek refuge with You from the whisperings (suggestions) of the Shayatin (devils). And I seek refuge with You, My Lord! Lest they should come near me. [Noble Quran 23:96-98]

Further, Allah said in Surat As-Sajdah:
"The good deed and the evil deed cannot be equal. Repel (the evil) with one which is better, then verily he, between whom and you there was enmity, (will become) as though he was a close friend. But none is granted it (the above quality) except those who are patient and none is granted it except the owner of the great portion (of happiness in the Hereafter, i.e. Paradise and of a high moral character) in this world. And if an evil whisper from Shaytan tries to turn you away (from doing good), then seek refuge in Allah. Verily, He is the Hearing, the Knowing" [Noble Quran 41:34-36]



The Tafsir of Istiadthah (seeking Refuge)

These are the only three Ayat that carry this meaning. Allah commanded that we be lenient human enemy, so that his soft nature might make him an ally and a supporter. He also commanded that we seek refuge from the satanic enemy, because the devil does not relent in his enmity if we treat him with kindness and leniency. The devil only seeks the destruction of the Son of Adam due to the vicious enmity and hatred he has always had towards mans father, Adam. Allah said:

"O Children of Adam! Let not Shaytan deceive you, as he got your parents (Adam and Hawa (Eve) (out of Paradise)" [Noble Quran 7:27]

"Surely, Shaytan is an enemy to you, so take (treat) him as an enemy. He only invites his Hizb (followers) that they may become the dwellers of the blazing Fire"
[Noble Quran 35:6]

And,

"Will you then take him (Iblis) and his offspring as protectors and helpers rather than Me while they are enemies to you What an evil is the exchange for the Dthalimun (polytheists, and wrongdoers, etc)" [Noble Quran 18:50]

The devil assured Adam that he wanted to advise him, but he was lying. Hence, how would he treat us after he had vowed:

"By Your might, then I will surely, mislead them all. Except Your chosen servants among them (i.e. faithful, obedient, true believers of Islamic Monotheism)." [Noble Quran 38:82-83]

Also, Allah said:

"(So when you) want to recite the Quran, seek refuge with Allah from Shaytan, the outcast (the cursed one). Verily, he has no power over those who believe and put their trust only in their Lord (Allah). His power is only over those who obey and follow him (Satan), and those who join partners with Him." [Noble Quran 16:98-100]


Khadejah Jones
Share Islam Team
ShareIslam.com

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